New Approach
I’ve noticed a bit of the old toxic behaviour creeping in so I’m going to try an AA technique. I’m simply going to count the days of moderation.
So today I can say……I am prone to excess & it has been three days since I last binged.
Funnily enough it was Friday the 13th when I last lost it.
Monday Itch
I’ve got the itch to drink.
It is because I drank Friday, Saturday & Sunday. I didn’t get drunk except Friday & even then it wasn’t a heavy drunk. Regardless I’ve got the itch.
Being cognizant of these patterns is one of the big gains of this blog. It is the awareness that keeps me ahead of the game. Helps me make the right choices.
I’ve got the itch but so what. I know how I got here & how’ll I’ll get out.
Childlike Chipperness
You know that time in your twenties where your a cheeky little f**k with an impish grin & the energy of a jungle cat?
Well all happy healthy people retain an element of that into later life. For me it disappeared a few years ago but really it had just been given a general anaesthetic by beer & spirits.
Mid April I took a weeks holiday during which we drank almost every night. Prior to that holiday & during it my inner imp was playing around. But by the end of the week he was going to sleep drugged on alcohol. Then I got back to my usual drinking rules & within a week he was back. But it took a week because like indulgence abstinence has a cumulative effect. It takes time. Especially as you get older.
I missed that little barsteward!
Wow!
Have you ever practised something hard for a long time it eventually slips into place without you be aware of it? I’ve realised that my craving for alcohol has acquiesced. I’ve stopped thinking about it & the odd thing is I didn’t even notice. It donned slippers & crept off!
As I’ve cut down it has waned but I’d still get it on a Friday night or after I’d had a couple of pints. But the need has just left me. I haven’t even thought about alcohol since I last drank 10 days ago. And I stopped at 4.6 units not really enjoying the drinks.
Wow! To not even think about it is something else. I’m really really happy to have got to this stage 
Resisting a Trigger
Last night I had my first real craving for alcohol since New Year. It stemmed from tiredness, boredom and the habit of Friday night drinking. There was only one beer in the fridge and the off licence was closed so it would be easy to moderate. Yet it would have been a mistake. There are three reasons:
- First & foremost I would be giving in to triggers. Very bad.
- I am trying to break old habits & routine. Drinking in the house on my own is one of them.
- It was after 11pm. I try not to drink close to bedtime as it ruins my sleep which somehow stimulates my drinking impulses the next day.
I woke up this morning after a solid 7 hours sleep feeling great. You can’t beat that.
Sensible Words on Alcohol
These comments by George Galloway strike me as quite a good take on complete abstinence. Though I think they could apply to quite severe moderation also.
It is a measured response which is refreshing in these days of media hype and scaremongering. It gives it credibility in my opinion.
Check out the ‘You Tube’ version as there are some quite interesting comments.
